Thursday, 26 March 2020

Corona's Virus, Adventurers Guild Briefing Day 3 - Be aware of Wizards and Teleporting

Morning Everyone

We’ve had a report this morning of several bags of supplies going missing from the merchants guild last night.  Guards report no one came in and no one got out, but the inventory count was down by more than thirty bags of grain, two boxes of salt, and a backscratcher with an extending handle.

We had a suspicion that something like this might come to pass, so we’d been working with the merchants guild to fit tamper proof locks to the bags that also contained a short range spell that would go off in the event of magic being used near it.  These locks are removed when someone buys a bag legitimately, but if they get moved by magic, they detonate after twenty minutes, covering the whole area with luminous manure that also acts as a nauseating agent.

At around 05:00 of the morning watch, the tower of Vladimir Renderov, freelance mage, was reported to have been lit up like a Christmas tree in a sewer, and upon investigation after the area was cleaned, was found to have the missing supplies in his tower.  We’ve cleaned him up and ensured that he’ll be spending the rest of the outbreak in magecuffs on the lower levels, but as times go on and supplies get shorter, we’ll be seeing more of this I don’t doubt.

In other news, the naturists guild just announced that they’ll be doing a sponsored hugging session to raise money for research into the virus.  We’ve allocated them a space just outside the city and as soon as they’re all outside, we’ll be throwing them some tents so they can wait it out, out there.  We’ve got no problem with bare-arsed deviancy, but we’re pretty sure it’s going to break the social distancing the rest of us are having to observe, the captains comment on it was that they can get as close as they like, as long as they stay away from us.

That’s everything for the morning watch, manure and mooning for everyone, just remember

Let’s be careful out there…