Friday, 13 April 2018

Alright, so what happened?

Because with the exception of a few posts in February, I've pretty much dropped off the planet with regards to social media presence.  Well, there is a simple explanation.

Mum died.

Five years of beating cancer and it coming back, and then beating it again, only for it to come back again, and in the end, not beating it.  I don't think I've fully processed what it meant to lose mum, I haven't taken any time away from work except for the funeral, and I've continued working at full pace on everything, including taking on a whole bunch of new responsibilities for conventions that aren't anything to do with games.

There's a part of me that thinks that I should have taken some time to stop and howl at the sky at the unfairness of everything, but there's a part greater than that, that says that what I should be doing is working harder to prove that all the effort Mum put in wasn't wasted on me.

I'm not sure, but I'm thinking the hard work option is where it's at, life isn't fair, and Mum never got to see the things I've been most proud of (Expo, Quest, Dragonmeet), and without Mum, it's unlikely Dad will ever come down to see them. But I'm going to continue, because this was when mum was most happy, when I came home from doing something epic, not depressed at what I have to do to pay the bills, but when I came from something I wanted to do, something I put my heart into, and won.

So I'm onwards, still here, still working.

and hopefully I'll be around a bit more...